That's right...we didn't win "The Ugliest Chair Contest" The green chair with the Duck tape took the title. I knew the duck tape would seal the deal. It truly is a great invention and I am just mad because I didn't think of it first. Here's the kicker, they didn't call us to let us know we did not win. Neal read it in the paper. Like a knife in the heart. Now every time I look at this ugly ass chair I get pissed off. I didn't think I could dislike that chair anymore than I already did but obviously I was wrong (sighhhhhhhh). This whole thing reminds me waht a sore loser I really am. Oh well. Neal thinks we should enter the chair in "The Ugliest Chair" circuit and travel around the country to enter it in contests. First of all I don't think there is a "circuit" for this type of thing and secondly we would need Amanda and her bus to pull that off.
So I went to court on Tuesday. Talk about uncomfortable. I was sitting about 20 feet away from the guy I was to testify against. Although I was surrounded by the 6 cops who were called to the scene so I felt pretty safe. And let me just tell you that the hour of conversation I listened to between the 6 cops was hysterical. There was a lot of waiting involved so they exchanged stories of the people they pulled over. Good stuff. So we watched them pick the jury and the solicitor tells me that they are going to try and offer him a plea and in that case I wouldn't have to testify. So for 30 minutes I sit there while they are all in a room. When they come out he took the guilty plea. Turns out the guy has two priors for the same thing and they have already lost custody of their two children. So sad. The solicitor told me if had not been for me he would have walked away with a dismissal from lack of evidence. I was the one and only witness so I feel good knowing that my being there got the jerk convicted. Everyone think good thoughts for their children wherever they are...they need them. So that's wraps up Law and Order: Rock Hill.
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4 comments:
you rock. even loosing the worlds ugiest chair contest. word is the winner slept with the judge.
Amanda's right..... slept with the judge.... and probably used duct tape as part of the deal. eeeeewwwwww!
As for the wife beater, one can only hope he will be serving as someone elses "wife" in a state pen somewhere in the not too distant future! You get a pair of supergirl panties as soon as one of us can find a pair for you!
Slept with the judge on the chair.
I think you should put yours out on the curb with a sign that says "Runner Up" and see if anyone takes it.
And it's a good thing you didn't have to forfeit the baby.
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